Part action, part strategy, this game takes you on a slow tractor ride through the mud-caked mundanity of animal husbandry and petty resource management.




(1,038 KB) 		"For those of us who live within the vast inhuman catacombs of London, there are few prospects more revivifying than that of a lively jaunt in the countryside. I have oftentimes noticed fellow passengers staring blankly through the graffiti-scarred panes of bus windows, absorbed no doubt in a sweet reverie of pastoral bliss. One needs only to observe the distant contentment in their eyes to appreciate that they are indeed immersed in a wholesome phantasy of life on a traditional farmstead. Only last week I witnessed some such poor soul who, in a moment of dazed disorientation, actually seemed to believe that they had found their imagined rural idyll – when in fact they were merely going past Finsbury Park.

"It is a well-known fact that the only thing more dreary than living in London, is trying to get out. This is why most people don’t bother. But what would it be like if you could somehow be transported immediately, and upon your own whim, into a scene of bucolic tranquillity? What a joyous occasion it would be if you suddenly found yourself amidst those lush pastures, without suffering the wretched ordeal of having to pass through Watford or Croydon.

"Well, my sordid city-dwellers, this seemingly irrevocable predicament has been overturned once and for all! Herald the arrival of PIGFARMING 3 – a multi-faceted strategic farming-simulation. Why recreate the grime and crime of urban environ- ments, like so many of today’s games do, when you can buy and sell livestock at the market, organise village fetes and decide where to build fences?

"Alongside these rustic pleasures, the game caters for those seeking to relieve some of the tension caused by the unrelenting stress and tedium of city life. Great delight can be had in machine-gunning trespassers, culling your animals or simply selling them off to scientists for use in grotesque experiments. But beware! Too much unethical behaviour invariably attracts the attention of the Animal Liberation Front, who will readily firebomb your farm house. Other misfortunes that may befall you include alien abductions, outbreaks of foot-and-mouth, satanic rituals involving cows and men hitting pigs with hammers. You can of course simply enjoy the convincing countryside scenes, relax in the company of milkmaids and watch your cattle copulating in the fields."

- Lord Cecil Humprey

The game begins with a breathtaking title-screen. Multimedia design at its best.





When your uncle Borris dies you inherit his farm and all his animals. These consist of two knackered old sheep, some neurotic pigs and a cow called Timothy Anderson.





If you're really unlucky your live-stock may get abducted by low-flying aliens.





Fun as it may be to ill-treat your animals you must be careful, otherwise the Animal Liberation Front will firebomb you.